I Bear Too Much Heartache

My soul weeps daily, nightly.

My eyes burn from reading too much.

My mind melts as I question the hatred.

My fingertips numb from the tapping…

The ongoing burden of hate that I see and hear tears at my heart. I will not watch it live. If it happens before me, I will lash out with my stinging tongue to warn the hater:

He will not impose his ugly soul on my people.

I will stand up and defend my people.

We are the majority who love and care for all others. Those who do not succumb to love will be banished from the Queendom.

#SoulLove

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Truth is a Pain

Truth is a pain

She bites and she burns

Leaving no stones left unturned

In my heart, mind, and soul

There lay no comfort for the one who stole

Something of importance from a friend to a friend

Details kept from me until I pushed to the end

The discovery burns deep as disappointment sets in

Thought I knew you better; that you would not commit such a sin

Taking from your brother and leading him on

How do you live with yourself from dusk until dawn?

So now I know and will never further recommend

This person I thought trustworthy and would always defend

Make good on this microphone and do the right thing

Perhaps again one day your praises I’ll sing

Let’s face it: you know a deal is a deal

Unless from a friend you don’t give a damn to steal

neumann-tlm103-studio

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

The President of the United States is Killing Me (and it’s not softly)

I wake up to die another day. It’s been this way since well before the man who should not be there pushed his way through into the daily consciousness of all good beings who intend to make our world a better place for all. He was sent by the dark lord of the far north to rattle and hum his way through to the utter destruction of every fiber of goodness we have sown and grown since the 1960’s. The white men of pasty bovine faces with triple chins delight in his boorish, meaningless vocalizations that leave even George Orwell clutching at the dirt above his grave to wrestle himself from expiration to yell, “Not this one! He can’t even bother to know one word from the next nor in what order they fall. This is not NewSpeak but Nonsense!”

I find myself in moments of gaiety with friends as we find time to make plans, enjoy them, complete them, and then return home to the quiet place inside where the largest of emergency packs seem not to be nearly enough for the future. My earthquake kit has turned into my doomsday kit which seems ever more imminent than the “California Big One.” Yesterday, I purchased a crowbar to add to my collection of items for the change that include heavy-duty gloves, bits of food that lasts for years, bottles of water (while it’s still clean and obtainable via spigot), cable ties, plastic tarp, socks, boots, two hats, thick clothing, flashlight, batteries, a bottle of vodka (to trade a shot for a bit of chili or to clean a wound), and a game of dominoes. As of late, I have been pondering the purchase of a small handgun…

The President of the United States is killing me. This is not the me I have known and loved for the ego-related segment of my 55-years. This is not the superego I have carefully coiffed from my caring human who strives to make the best judgments for the good of all. This is not the me whose conscience weighs heavy these past couple years with thoughts that I must do more to help save our America from this evil intrusion that has spawned the agents of Nosferatu to rise up and erase all good from the planet,  sucking out every molecule of life from its core. That me shuffles through my quotidian work, placing one foot carefully in front of the other like a post-lobotomized Randle McMurphy in Kesey’s “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest.”

Collectively, we are being lobotomized by a government that no longer operates on principles. Ours is now a government that lies on a minute-by-minute timeline – a circadian rhythm of lying. The GOP serves its innate greed by changing rules as it needs to succeed (Garland SCOTUS pick held hostage, enabling Chief Nosferatu, gerrymandering), and rigging a system so deep that they have tunneled all the way to Siberia to chain it to the other side.

Yes, I’m still going to bed and waking up at hours I’ve associated with wellness my entire life. Yes, I make way to the outdoors to breathe in the cool ocean air and move my body in an attempt to keep it fit. Yes, I communicate with others every day, but it feels like we all swirl about in slow motion among the aisles of choice in the supermarket in Stepford.

I shall continue to prepare my classes for the fall semester even though I wonder if there will be one…

evil spawn of satan evil spawn of satan

 

Posted in People, Politics | Leave a comment

“I believe your people are inherently evil.”

“As I believe you said before we think differently. I believe your people are inherently evil. Nothing will change that. Especially that scumbag Obama and the hideous Hillary. I wouldn’t bother wasting your time in that regard but if you’d like to share something about your life that’s positive I would love to hear about you personally. If you are having [a] challenge I would love to pray for you and always wish you only the best.” (received via FB messenger today)

I’ve been making fool-hearted attempts to assist a couple of my former high school compadres to look into the light and seek the truth. One is a staunch supporter of the GOP and this disaster in the WH who thumbs up and high fives every statement in support of him. It makes me sad every time I see it and I thought I would try a hail mary pass by sending a video showing snippets from the 8 years Obama endured the right wingnuts on Fox slam him for any type of connection he discussed regarding our adversaries juxtaposed to days ago when DJT “scored a big win” in his meeting with the despot of the DPRK. The current  President of the United States of America declared it was “an honor” to meet one of the most cold-blooded, ruthless murderers on the planet. He shunned our friendly neighbor to the north one minute and in the next, touched the arm and back of a dictator numerous times, gently ushering KJU into a meeting as a lover would to his boudoir en route to their play date. As if the optics of seeing our flags intertwined with those of DPRK before either foul human took the stage wasn’t enough to curdle my soul.

Growing up in idyllic San Diego, one would think that everyone blessed enough to live and grow in such a place would see humans, animals, plants, oceans, lakes, and rivers in the same way. I understand (a little) how the mindset of poor citizens in the coal-mining country might be easily conned by our new dictator in the making, but someone who grew up in San Diego, California? This is the stranglehold of Fox News, the leviathan that gobbles up the minds of its viewers like Jabba the Hut swallows his subordinates. Speaking of, it seems we are living on the doomed Tatooine, no? Well, if Pruitt stays on as EPA chief, perhaps.

Further sharing with someone who is oblivious to the hell being brought upon the good people of the world from our wanna-be dictator in chief lead me to see her picturesque profile. She and her family look happy. The kids go to Christian school and from the picture postings, it looks like they travel and have fun. It was sweet of her to offer to pray for me if I’m having some sort of challenge in life. Those are kind words from a Christian. Somehow they don’t correlate with a previous sentence, “I believe your people are inherently evil.”  Confounding, n’est-ce pas? After all, my people are the ones who spread love and peace. When did that become evil? I guess love and peace is the Newspeak of hate and sin. It’s a sad day when we know that those 30-ish percent of 45-loving Americans actually believe that the rest of us who wish for peace and progress hold evil in our hearts and minds.

C’est bizarre.

 

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

The Base Bezonian

I think it’s time to bring back a few words from the chest of archaic verbiage. Why? For me, it helps to find more ways to free myself from the daily onslaught of the mad king. His pervasive lying and bloated edicts leave the global masses indignant and filled with loathing. I am one of them and one with them.

I listen to Tim Robbins narrate Fahrenheit 451. From the Wiki:

“Fahrenheit 451 is a dystopian novel by American writer Ray Bradbury, published in 1953. It is regarded as one of his best works. The novel presents a future American society where books are outlawed and “firemen” burn any that are found. The book’s tagline explains the title: “Fahrenheit 451 – the temperature at which book paper catches fire, and burns…” The lead character is a fireman named Montag who becomes disillusioned with the role of censoring works and destroying knowledge, eventually quitting his job and joining a resistance group who memorize and share the world’s greatest literary and cultural works.

The novel has been the subject of interpretations focusing on the historical role of book burning in suppressing dissenting ideas. In a 1956 radio interview, Bradbury said that he wrote Fahrenheit 451 because of his concerns at the time (during the McCarthy era) about the threat of book burning in the United States. In later years, he described the book as a commentary on how mass media reduces interest in reading literature.”

HBO has produced a film based on the book to be released in 2018. (Check out the linked trailer.)

Are we inching closer to this realm presided over by the mad king?

Bezonian is a word that popped up in my Dictionary.com feed today. It’s perfect.

nounArchaic.
1. an indigent rascal; scoundrel.
In this case, I apply the word base in its adjective form: vulgar, low
Enough said.
Fahrenheit_451_hero
Dictionary_Bezonian)
Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Ephemeral Living

Last night I attended an outstanding premiere of a documentary that has been over 10-years in creation. Remember the wonderful music of cool, alternative hip-hop group from Atlanta called Arrested Development? (Yes, way before the show of the same name.) Speech (born Todd Thomas), the founder, lead vocalist and producer of the band’s tracks has been busy on a project to record four talented, incarcerated men at the Richmond City Justice Center in Virginia. The poignant documentary demonstrates the healing power of music alongside the terrifying reality of drug addiction and the difficulty of restraint once hooked. Their inner battles pour out of their souls in their lyrics. It’s certainly a program that every city in America should undertake in order to do our best to rehabilitate the incarcerated. I teared up throughout the entire film as it moved my heart to witness the power of human kindness. The plan is to release an album that Speech has just completed for the project.

People who grow up in a wealthy society with the constant push to achieve when one has nothing to begin with is a central tenet of the American Dream. Make something of yourself.

  • “It’s a she thing and it’s all in me I could be anything that I want to be.”                    ~Salt-N-Pepa, Ain’t Nuthin’ But A She Thing
  • “I know I can, be what I wanna be / If I work hard at it, I’ll be where I wanna be,”  ~Nas, I Can

An ephemeral moment in the 1990’s – songs about female empowerment and another for children of all colors to proudly sing about the American Dream (“work hard to be where I wanna be”) and that it’s there for the taking to conquer life and live free.  If only. Fast-forward to the past couple of years and it feels like we have been pushed back in time to the hate-filled history of retreading a birth of a nation. The intense backlash from 8-years of our first black President (and in my opinion, the best we have had in decades) reverberates around every city and county in America. The ephemeral joy of singing that we can be anything we want to be if only we try works for but a handful of Americans lucky enough to seize the moment in a synchronicity of the universe. Many African Americans live with the horrific notion that driving to the store might get them shot if they have a tail light out and our Latino/a populations dread they might get picked up in an I.C.E. raid on their way to or at work.  What kind of nation treats humans in this manner? The claim that this is a Christian nation is a sick joke. Real Christians don’t behave this way. People who believe in the values and work of Jesus Christ do not think this way. We have a minority of soulless individuals in power for a short time raping and pillaging the treasury and sinking this nation into a hellish abyss filled with fear and enmity.

The four men in the documentary titled 16 Bars (the film) each have a unique story of a life in a drug-addled repeat a la Groundhog Day–committing the same crimes after each release = recidivism. Their journey through music can help them change course. Be sure to watch this when you have the chance. Stay tuned.

Posted in Music, People | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Man Who Stole America’s Soul

How do we endure this nightmare any longer? How do we accomplish the immediate task to remove the metastisizing cancer-mouth from the WH? We suffer in a stew of his venomous finger-tapping. Can someone PLEASE stop his Twitter account by any means necessary?

Today as he walks into church on Easter Sunday, Don the Con decides to rain hellfire and damnation on our nation’s Dreamers (AGAIN). Another piece of my soul drips out onto the rug. We “NEED WALL” 3-feet-wide and 420-feet-high built around this inhumane snake oil talisman. His hourly execrable tweets ramp up the nation’s ire. Be gone, demon!

DonTheCon   LOCK HIM UP!  LOCK HIM UP!

Here are a few biblical passages on “deceiving” which I find apropos to this Easter Sunday day of Redemption:

  • 2 Timothy 3:13  While evil people and impostors will go on from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived.
  • Leviticus 19:11  You shall not steal; you shall not deal falsely; you shall not lie to one another.
  • Revelation 12:9  And the great dragon was thrown down, that ancient serpent, who is called the devil and Satan, the deceiver of the whole world—he was thrown down to the earth, and his angels were thrown down with him.

The soul of America has been lost many times over and redeemed on few occasions, but this time I feel that America enters the possessed state of eternal damnation.

Let us forget not the memory of the dark deeds of white evangelicals on an Easter Sunday in our past…

Let us forget not the horrible deeds of the 45th sitting illegally-elected President of the UnTied States.

Oh, please Chinese space station plummeting back to earth: can you land on Mar-A-Lago later today?

For me, today is not a day for cute bunnies, colored eggs, and sugary peeps. Today is the day to stand tall in the resistance.

 

TrumpOilSalesman

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment